Author: Wendy Young

The power of a successful homeschool journey cannot be over emphasized. Every parent who home schools wants to enjoy the adventure, grow close to their children and have well rounded children at the end of it. But moms hold the power to sabotage their own homeschools and often they do not even know they are doing it. Here are some warnings (and remedies) for homeschooling parents so that you are do not become one of them.

Warning #1 – You have no systems in place

How do you know this is happening? You cannot find your school books, the children cannot find their pens and pencils, your laundry is piling up and you cupboards and fridge are empty.

Solution – Take one afternoon on the weekend to plan your meals, do your grocery shopping, get your books ready for the next week and get your children to make sure their desks and pencil boxes are ready for Monday. Set up a laundry system in your home to make sure that your family has clean clothing and linens.

Warning #2 – Your children take forever to do their work

Some children are slow workers, but many are dawdlers. If your junior grade children are taking more than a 3 hours to do their work or your high schooler more than 6 hours then chances are that they are wasting time.

Solution – Make sure that you are giving your children short lessons so that dawdling is discouraged. Ensure that you alternate a hard lesson for a easier lesson. Take the time to train your children in the habit of attention so that they learn the importance of giving something their full attention and completing work in a timely fashion.

Warning #3 – Your children spend more time on school work than life

If your children are spending more than a third of their day in formal academic pursuits, it is a sure fire way of producing burnout in mom and child.

Solution – Raymond and Dorothy Moore, grandparents of the homeschooling movement, make use of a head, heart and hand principle. They said that a child’s day should be balanced equally between these three occupations. Head refers to academic pursuits; Hand refers to work in and around the home like chores and entrepreneurial activities and Heart refers to spiritual and moral training a parent should impart.

Warning #4 – Your children are allowed unlimited daily doses of TV and computer

Children should not watch TV or work on the computer everyday. It is an unhealthy situation as the stimulus that the brain receives from these two activities causes a dumbing down process where the child forgets how to entertain themselves, play out imaginary games and be productively and creatively busy – to mention just a few negatives.

Solution – Make a list of all the productive pursuits that your child can do and put to when they nag and ask for TV or their computer games. Ensure that you draw them alongside you in your day to day activities – and set the example yourself!

Warning #5 – Mom does not ensure that she is sufficiently rested

When a mom is tired, burnt out and running from play-dates to sports all afternoon and never takes a moment for a quiet cup of tea and a book, she is bound to be tense and overwrought. When mom has nothing left, she cannot give to her children and be a healing presence in her home.

Solution – Mom needs to set aside small moments in her day to take a breather. This can be a chapter of a good book, a walk around the garden, a cup of tea – on her own. It could also mean getting to bed earlier so that she can rise before her family with a small head start on her day. Mom needs to take time out monthly as well, so that she can set her hand to a craft or hobby where she can take off the “homeschooling mom hat.”

Warning #6 – The homeschooling parents talk of nothing but their children

Does it seem like whenever mom and dad go out or have a moment together, all they talk about is homeschooling and parenting? While there is time for that, it is also very important that they take time to remember that their relationship ranks right up there in importance.

Solution – Make a pact that you will do something special together, weekly or monthly, where you do not talk about homeschooling, parenting or household matters. Just enjoy being together.

Warning #7 – Parents control their children rather than build relationship with their children

This is a tough one… isn’t it? We want the best for our children; we want them to be all they were created to be and to achieve much in their lives. But often a parent will go overboard and forget that the reason they are raising children is so that they can be strong valuable members of a community.

Solution – Like a young sapling tree, protect your children as they need it. Train them in moral and spiritual guidelines as you take hold of those truths as well. As they grow and show maturity in certain areas, permit them to begin making their own decisions within the realm of what is permissible to your boundaries as a family unit.

Warning #8 – A homeschooling mom who spend too much time feeding on other lives

I left this for last because this one point can be the single most damaging thing that can happen to any homeschool. When a mom is always comparing herself and her children to what the next person is doing, what the other children have achieved, the projects that they are doing, instead of getting on and living her life with her children, she is bound to become frustrated and defeated.

Solution – Accept the season that your family is in – perhaps you have just had a baby and an in-depth unit study will sent your teetering over the edge! Perhaps your children have special needs and are not able to concentrate for long. Whatever the reason… accept the season. Also remember that each home and family is unique and your family has a specific flavor to it. When you try and bring in another family’s culture to your own, you dilute the beauty of your family.

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Wendy Young is the homeschooling mom to 4 children aged 7 – 14 years. They have always been at home. She has been married for 19 years. Wendy’s website, Homeschool-Curriculum-For-Life, is dedicated to helping moms choose curriculum, get organized, and enjoy the homeschool journey by equipping them as their roles as wives, women, and moms.

Author: Rachel Paxton
ShareBy the time your children reach their teens, there is only a limited amount of time left to influence them and get them started in life in the right direction.

The teen years are a critical time for role models in your children’s lives. Often you will find teens have a hard time talking to their parents. This isn’t always the case, but even in the closest families, teens often feel more comfortable talking to another trusted adult about some of the things going on in their lives.

Of course you would prefer your teen would go to an adult when they need to talk something important out, instead of relying on their friends who may not have the insight an older, more experienced adult would have.

Obviously you have no real control over who your teen goes to for advice, but there are a number of ways you can steer your teen in the right direction.

The best chance your teen has for interacting with other adults is in extracurricular activities. There are all kinds of activities your teen can be involved with, here are some that come to mind: church youth group, scouts, sports, music, school clubs, community service, just to name a few. Personally I don’t encourage parents to involve their teens in so many activities that it leads to burnout for both the parents and the teen, but carefully selected activities led by good and capable leaders will enrich your teen’s life in a way few things can, and will increase the likelihood that your teen will establish a relationship with one of the group leaders.

One word of caution, however. Talk to your teen about their activities and get a feel for yourself the effectiveness of the group leader. Not to say that they have to excel in every way, but just make sure that they are a good role model, and not a negative influence in your teen’s life. There is the potential of bad leaders in any activity, including in a church setting, and it is the parents’ responsibility to make sure their teen is in a positive atmosphere, influenced by mature leaders.

Involvement in group activities is especially great for teens of single parents. Teens who don’t have regular contact with mature adults of both sexes often have a hard time later in normal adult relationships. Being exposed to “normal” at this age very much increases the teen’s chances of growing into a well-adjusted adult. I have seen this often with boys who are raised by their moms with not much influence or negative influence from their dads.

Placed into group settings, with responsible adult male leaders, these teen boys have much less difficulty transitioning into adulthood. It also takes of a lot of the pressure off the often overworked mothers.

From my own experience, I have found that often other adults can help my teen in ways that I can’t, mostly due to big differences in our personalities. I am more of a quiet introspective thinker, and my daughter is very outgoing, and has a lot of potential leadership qualities that are hard for me to help her develop because I do not possess those qualities myself. Knowing how important it is to help her develop her natural abilities at this impressionable age, I make sure there are other adults in her life who can help influence her in ways I can’t. My daughter and I are very close, but there are just a lot of things that I can’t help her with, so I encourage her in developing relationships with adults who do have those abilities.

My daughter and I both respect our different abilities. It is very easy to be critical of people who are not like us, and parents and teens very easily fall into this trap. The best thing to do is be honest about your own abilities, and of the abilities of your teen, and do whatever is necessary to find outside influences for your teen. The more you can help your teen develop their abilities now, the less they will have to do on their own later (often, the hard way).

And don’t forget, you are a role model too. Get involved in the lives of your teen’s friends, or volunteer to help in a group activity in some way, even if only occasionally. There are teens out there who really need to hear what you have to say.

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Rachel Paxton is a freelance writer and mom of five. For resources for the Christian family, including parenting, toddler and preschool activities, homeschooling, family traditions, and more, visit http://www.Christian-Parent.com

Mimi Rothschild Asks “Homeschool Curriculum – Do I Need It?”

Author: Heidi Johnson

Homeschool curriculum and books are plentiful.  Choosing from the huge selection can be overwhelming.  Do you really need to purchase a home school curriculum or can you save some money and home school with books alone?  Here are some thoughts that can help you make your decision:

1.  You need a core plan – Whether you purchase a home school curriculum or develop your own, you need to know what you want to accomplish.  What do you think your child should be doing each day?  What do you want them to know and understand by the time the school year is over?

2.  Focus on reading, writing and arithmetic – Any good home school program focuses on the basics.  Make sure you address the core subjects and know what you want to accomplish there before you add any other subjects to your list.

3.  Know how you and your child learn best – Learning style plays a key role in how you and your children will learn.  In public school teachers can’t really teach based on learning style because of the volume of students they have to work with.  But a home school parent can certainly know their child’s learning style and use resources to support that.  If you don’t know yours or your child’s learning style you can take an assessment online and find out.  http://www.hjresources.com/hsrecommend  Then when you decide to choose curriculum or books you will know what types of resources you need.  You might even save yourself a lot of frustration in the long run.

4.  Use your resources – In the early days of home schooling there wasn’t much available to parents.  That is definitely not the case now.  There is almost too much information available now.  You have the internet, library and a host of used curriculum sites where you can get books and resources at a fraction of the cost.

5.  Do you use a curriculum to learn something yourself?  Think about what you do when you want to learn about something.  Do you buy a curriculum to learn or do you read books, listen to audio and watch videos?  Your children need to see you have a love for learning.  You can learn about how to cook, sew, garden, remodel your house, improve your skills at a job, etc. 

Even though purchasing a curriculum can give you a feeling of security knowing that everything your child needs to know will be covered, be careful that you don’t take on too much and get burned out.  If you focus on the basics and know what you want to accomplish, then you can make an informed decision as to whether you will need to purchase a curriculum or whether you can just use books and resources to accomplish the same goals.

For more tips on homeschooling, grab your free report “How to Homeschool using the Best Resources” at http://www.hjresources.com/freehs Heidi Johnson specializes in helping families find resources to simplify and improve their lives.

About the Author: Resources to simplify and improve your life – Heidi Johnson specializes in finding resources to help you.  Download her free ebooks and courses at her website.

Mimi Rothschild Brings You “Top 12 Reasons to Homeschool Your Children“